To honor this anniversary, I’m sharing one question and reflection per day for seven days, one for each year of this journey.
Today is Year Three.
Day 3 / Year 3
Okay, we all remember where we were, physically and mentally, in May 2020, right?
At the end of February, I had just returned from Costa Rica, feeling rested and aligned. One week later… the world shut down.
So many memories come back. My language school didn’t want to close, and since our visas were tied to it, we had no choice but to keep going. No income. No clarity. What started as a “one-week” situation became “one day at a time.”
I had lived alone for over ten years. Having roommates in NYC wasn’t a big deal, most of the time, you’re not home at the same time. And my roommates understood that if I needed to stay in my bubble, that was okay.
But during lockdown, everything shifted. We were all home, all the time. One of them was focused mostly on her own needs. She wanted to continue “life as usual,” even if it affected our shared space. That was a real culture shock.
She even convinced us to take on a house project, we built a desk in our backyard. I’ll admit it turned out great and was actually useful. But I just wanted to rest.
I had worked so hard to get to the New York, survived a fire the year before, and was navigating life as an international student without legal permission to work. When the U.S. government announced a ban on international visas, I started to wonder: Am I missing some kind of sign that I’m not supposed to be here?
My parents didn’t understand why I wanted to stay.
I remember standing in line at Trader Joe’s for over an hour with my backpack and a grocery list for all three roommates. Disinfecting every item. Having all our avocados ripen at the same time.
That summer, the BLM movement took over the streets of New York with a fierce energy.I learned about the meaning of white privilege.
Survival mode got switched on, and honestly, it hasn’t fully turned off since.Our nervous system needs proper care, even when living in a peaceful place like Hawai’i.
But there was also beauty. The feeling of permission to relax. No pressure to achieve anything. No airplanes. No rush. Just calm. A global pause. This strange experience that everyone on Earth was going through at the same time.
I joined a women’s support group led by Sofia Lilly. My roommates and I subscribed to wine delivery boxes. We cooked and baked so much. I made new friends. And had a dancing party in my room, live from a friend's DJ’s apartment. Zoom calls for the aperitif.
We planted seeds — metaphorical ones, but also actual ones (and I can tell you: don’t bother with lavender).
Today’s question is from Katia Davis:What kept you going when it was hard?
Coming back to my why.
I made a promise to myself when I left Switzerland: if I ever felt unhappy again, I would shift. That promise was my anchor.
So I kept checking in with myself. Is my why still aligned? Does it still feel right? When the answer was yes, I put myself into what I call “robot mode” and I kept moving forward.
I had worked too hard to get out of a life that didn’t feel like mine. I wasn’t going to let a fire or a pandemic take away the life I had chosen.
When life gets hard, you have two options depending on your capacity. You can disconnect and crawl into a bubble, or you can build resilience.
I’ve always been a bit hard-headed. But living in NYC taught me to bounce back. To deal with culture shock. To express myself in a second language, even when it felt like too much. Every new challenge built resilience.
I remembered my why.I chose to stay.And I faced what came next.See you tomorrow for day three.
With Gratitude,Nina
