I recently had conversations with different people who felt scared of being stuck, and some felt scared of the unknown, not having a plan. Here is what I realized reflecting on that matter: fear of being stuck IS fear of the unknown.

I know that sounds backwards. If I truly feared being stuck, I would already be moving, taking action, doing something different. But action means risk. Risk means the unknown. Risk means no control over the outcome. So when I fear both staying stuck AND the unknown, I’m already stuck. The crossroad becomes paralysis.

My head is my fear talking, protecting me based on my beliefs, my mindset, my values, my past. My heart is what I really want, what makes me feel alive, what my soul is saying “go” to.

I’m figuring out if I should renew my green card.

Head says: Don’t lose it. You worked hard for it. What if you need it? (Uncomfortable comfort zone talking.)Heart says: I want a break. I want my freedom back.

What does freedom back even mean?

I haven’t left the US since 2020. Five years. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love to travel; it’s one of my favorite things in the world. But it’s more than that.

Freedom means having free speech again. Right now, I have to be careful about what I share, with who, on what platform. I want to share my whole story, but I’d have to censor parts of it. Even sharing through podcasts or my brand, I think twice.

Travel became complicated. Decisions became complicated. Everything became calculated. It hasn’t been like this for all seven years I’ve been in the US, but for most of it, and my nervous system wants a break.

I keep thinking about why I left Switzerland in the first place. I was living next to my life, feeling that my heart was calling to be somewhere else. I always felt at home in NYC; my nervous system matched with my inner child and I could be my true self.

And now here I am, having to censor who I actually am. Not just what I say—me. The person I worked so hard to discover. The person I’ve been learning to embrace.

The green card was supposed to give me freedom: the ability to stay, to travel, to build a life. But the protections keep shrinking and the rules keep changing. I’m asked to renew something that costs me the very thing I came here for.

I know this might sound selfish. So many people have it worse, I know that. But this feeling is real. It’s heavy. It breaks my heart.

And I’m not alone in this decision anymore. There are other people and more responsibilities. I think I’m going to have to choose against my heart, and I don’t know how to be okay with that yet. Or ever. My whole self is screaming and shaking inside. ”Set me free…!”

Five months after I moved to NYC, I already knew the rhythm wasn’t for me. But I always remembered something my dad said before I left Switzerland: “NYC might not be the end goal, but it’s a first step toward something.” I think about that a lot. It gives less weight to the decisions I make and more trust that I’ll figure it out.

Then the pandemic hit. It froze 2-3 years of my life. By 2022, I felt really stuck, like when I was in Switzerland. I knew I needed to keep moving but didn’t know where or what I would do, and I was exhausted from the surviving phase of the pandemic. It’s a regular struggle; we feel exhausted, we want something to change, and we blame ourselves for not doing anything.

I was planning to travel for a bit, to take a break from here, slow down on working, take care of myself and my relationship with my husband. I’m someone who enjoys being in a different environment, not only because it’s fun to discover new cultures, see new landscapes, meet new people, eat nice food, but because when I slow down, the answers come to me.

That’s exactly what happened when I came to Hawaii on vacation for a month. I stayed in an Airbnb in the middle of the jungle with only a bike to get around, since I don’t have my license.

So I voluntarily got myself physically stuck, to get bored, draw, read, hang out in the sun, take a thousand naps, and observe nature. I did it so I could face myself for real.

And after only 10 days, my inner voice said: “You are ready to leave NY.” I felt at peace. Free.

For three years, I’d been caught between wanting to leave and not knowing where to go. The pandemic had slowed me down; I had to focus on staying, not running. My fear of the unknown and what could be challenging kept me blocked. But in that jungle Airbnb, with nothing but time and quiet, the answer came.

So I wanted to do that again. I want a break from everyday life to hear my inner voice, especially from this country and its news, because even if you don’t listen to it, it finds you, especially if you aren’t a citizen.

The travel isn’t going to happen when I PLANNED, and now I have to accept making a decision differently, out of my comfort zone. The crossroad is hard. I don’t have the answer yet; I gave myself until Sunday to decide. So here I am again, at a crossroad, trying to trust that the answer will come, even if it’s not on my timeline.

This is why working with a coach or someone who can help you look deeper is so valuable. My style of coaching is very intuitive and adaptive to the person I have in front of me, where they are in their journey, and how aware they are about themselves, their mindset, their belief systems, and their blind spots.

Through our work, I help you see your unseen. I’m by your side, on the same level, so you can remove what doesn’t belong and embrace what does, helping you feel empowered and strong to engage in what your heart is really calling you toward.

Sometimes being stuck isn’t bad; it’s just information. Be curious, my friend.

What’s your fear telling you? And question your answers; are they based on true facts?

What is your crossroad right now? What’s your head saying? What’s your heart saying?

Reply and tell me; I read every response.

With gratitude,Nina