I never felt at home in Switzerland. I always wanted to leave.

But I spent 17 years finding reasons not to go.

Between ages 17 and 34, I flew to New York nineteen times. Nineteen. That’s not a vacation pattern. That’s your soul trying to tell you something.

But I didn’t listen. I built cases against it instead.

First it was money. Then my English. Then the visa - too complicated, I told myself. And then came the relationships. I got involved with people rooted in Switzerland, and suddenly my dream became something to sacrifice. Those relationships ended. The dream didn’t.

Looking back, I don’t think I was really aware of what I was doing. I just stayed in this scenario of “It’s my dream” without actually envisioning it in reality. It was a dream I kept repeating. Safe. Distant.

I let the challenges stop me before I even started. I let the challenges lead me instead of the other way around. Because there were obstacles, and people sharing their biased perspectives, I let all of it block me. It took over. It became my beliefs.

I was in a cage - not based on facts I’d experienced, but on outside insights.

Your soul will keep calling until you listen. Mine called for 17 years through 19 trips. I wasn’t building readiness. I was building better excuses not to trust what I actually wanted.

I’d lived on my own for 12 years in Switzerland. My own apartment.

Comfortable. Independent.

When I decided to move to NYC, I had to accept what everyone was doing to save money - but also because people aren’t really spending much time in their apartments there anyway. They’re busy at work, going out, living that New York City life. The opposite of where I’m from.

I looked for a room. I wasn’t an expat. No job waiting for me. Just my savings. Back to school. And traveling - one of my favorite things in the world - I had to give that up. I used to go to London twice a year, Greece, Paris, NYC. But as a student living on savings with visa restrictions, I couldn’t travel like that anymore. Less money. Starting over.

The reality? I found an amazing room in South Brooklyn by the J line. Great roommates. One became my best friend. We went through a fire in our building together and started new in a bigger place in Bed-Stuy. Two floors. Our own backyard. That space was a gift during the pandemic - we could breathe without being on top of each other.

I learned so much being surrounded by people from all over the world at school. I left situations that made me miserable, situations my old self would have surely stayed in. I met so many amazing people.

And I learned things about myself and others that I - this white privileged lady from Switzerland - really needed to learn and face.

My soul had been crushed from never feeling at home where I was. I took action. I embraced that 17-year call.

I’m living in Hawaii now and looking back, I realize something.

The question was never about being ready. It was never about perfect timing or having enough money or speaking better English.

It was: Who was I waiting for? My mind and fear? Or my soul?

And who was I letting down by not stepping up?

The trade-offs were real. I haven’t seen some good friends in seven years. I can’t visit my parents whenever I want. I haven’t left the US since 2020 - and anyone who knows me knows how much I love to travel.

But here’s what I learned: material comfort means nothing compared to actually living.

Loving myself, choosing my own life - that became non-negotiable.

Maybe it sounds selfish. But I’d tried the other way for 33 years and I was miserable. So when I left Switzerland, I made myself a promise: if I’m ever unhappy again, I shift. I don’t let years pile up in the wrong life.

Less is more. And living aligned has no price.

For everyone stuck in the “what if” - playing out all the dramatic scenarios in your head - what if it’s hard for a while but life rewards you because you chose your true desire?

What if taking the risk is the whole point?

I believe this: when we don’t take the lead in our own lives, we block the universe from giving us what we’ve been asking for. We give more power to the scary scenarios than to what we actually want.

I wish I’d gone when I was younger. Not because I wasn’t ready at 34 - I was. But because I spent nearly two decades betraying what I knew was true. And those are years I don’t get back.

What is one small thing you could do today to move in the direction your heart wants to go?

Not the big leap. Just one small thing.

Reply and tell me - what dream are you keeping at a safe distance by just repeating it?

I read every response.

With gratitude,Nina

Ready to Move Forward? Don’t miss our next Sacred Space Live!

Katia Davis and I are diving into the powerful topic of “Moving Forward” next Wednesday.

Whether you’re feeling stuck or simply seeking inspiration, this conversation is for you.

🗓️ Wednesday, November 12th⏰ 2 PM HST | 4 PM PST | 7 PM EST📍 Watch Live on: • The Sacred Space YouTube Channel • Katia’s InstagramSee you there!